If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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