I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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