He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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