He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
