Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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