Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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