Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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