I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
