Can i not drive my cunt home
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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