tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
