Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Randomize
