I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
