but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
