Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
