Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
