I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize