come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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