Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
