I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
