I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
