she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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