In the future we'll all be gay
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
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