worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
