After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
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