I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I think I sprained my soul last night
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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