you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
did i just pee glitter
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
