I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
