hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
