so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Randomize
