Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
