I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
