is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
