Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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