Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
