Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
Randomize