wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize