You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
