Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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