this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
