he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
