We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
