I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
