Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
there is glitter all over my balls
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