a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
