just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
