I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
