It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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