Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
