you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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