and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Randomize
